Lately it has been hard for me to focus on the seemingly trivial tasks at hand as I look forward to the World Race. I have been struggling to find my purpose for being here, in Colorado, during this specific period of time. I am helping coach volleyball at CCU and I'm still involved with the youth group at my church, but all these things seem so small in comparison to what I will be doing a year from now. I know I am exactly where God wants me to be right now, but that doesn't mean I do not still struggle with finding my purpose and identity.
We had a tournament in Kansas this past weekend, and during the 7 hour drive on the way there, I listened to a sermon that hit me right where I was at. It was as if God was speaking directly to me! The whole thing was about finding our identity in Christ, rather than in what we do. This seems to be a recurring theme in my life over the past few months as I have begun placing my identity in the wrong things, even though they are good. The point of the sermon was that when we find our identity in the "good things" that we do, we begin to get prideful. Even though we may not verbalize it, we are often thinking, "Look at all these great things I'm doing to serve the Lord," but often we are trying to do them on our own.
I have been really convicted of this lately as I have begun preparing for my trip. I put in a lot of time and effort working on my support letters and World Race blog, but I haven't been putting in much prayer. Same with coaching volleyball and being a leader at youth group--I have just been going along through the day-to-day tasks, but I have hardly put any prayer into either of those. I really need to be more intentional about covering everything I do in prayer and letting God use me and work through me.
Last night as we were on our way home from Kansas (after winning 2 matches!!), I came across this verse in Exodus and it was really encouraging to me as I have been struggling with finding my purpose:
"For this purpose I have raised you up, to show you my power, so that my name may be proclaimed in all the earth."
--Exodus 9:16
That's all I need to know and I need to be constantly reminded of the fact that the reason I am here is to make His name great! Glory to God!
